More Than We Can Handle

This is Brandon tonight, sitting with our computer at Jude's bedside.  What a treat to be next to him this evening.  I wanted to share with you some recent ponderings of mine.

The phrase, "God will not give you more than you can handle" is frequently said to people who go through difficult things.  I think it's a mistaken notion often spoken by well-intentioned people.  In the New Testament we find in the book of Galatians the exact opposite.  In chapter 6 verse 2 it says, "Bear one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ."  The word 'burden' in the original Greek represents something too heavy for just one person to carry, like a boulder.

If we are commanded to bear one another's burdens, that presumes that we will have experiences and seasons where what's happening to us is too large to bear on our own.  We will in some way be 'crushed' by them.  I think this is exactly how God designed it.

A number of years ago, in order to help our staff team experience this reality, I had them do an activity where we walked a mile and a half through our neighborhood carrying lots of stuff (5 gallon jugs full of water, tables, backpacks, etc).  Most of it was heavy and awkward to carry.  I was intentional to keep an eye on people and ask if they needed help.  While watching out for others, I was also carrying a lot not wanting to burden someone else too much.

We finished the trek then had a debrief about what we did, what we said and didn't say, and why we responded how we did.  I can't recall any of the particulars of what we learned that day (though I'm sure we learned something :) ).  What I do remember clearly is that two days later my arms were really sore!  I had carried too much for too long and I chose not to ask for help.  I wanted to be the one that helped and, therefore, I wasn't willing to depend on others in ways that would have kept me from unnecessary pain.

I have seen in my own life, and now more than ever before, that the Lord consistently gives us more than we can handle.  He wants to teach us that we are needy, that we are weak, that we are living independently (of Him and others).  I often want to prove the opposite, that I'm not needy, I'm not weak, and I can face life's challenges on my own.

But these burdens are meant to train us to cry out to Him more.  They are intended to force us to ask others for help.  He wants to teach us that we are broken and desperate for His power and presence.  We need others and, most of all, we need Christ.  The American dream of financial independence and freedom leads us down a path of terrible loneliness, especially for men.

Over the last five weeks I've picked up the phone numerous times and asked a good buddy to listen, give me their perspective and pray for me.  I've invited a few of these friends to come to Albuquerque and join us, even be willing to fly in.  I know I need others.  I'm starting to believe that this a mature way to live.  I've lived a mainly independent, self-sufficient way for many years.  I still live independently at times but the Lord is gently, graciously breaking me of that.  Thank you, Father!

I want to be fully engaged in this process.  I want to enjoy Jude every day we have with him.  I want to delight in and support my wonderful wife.  I want to love the nurses and doctors we are blessed to have treat Jude.  I want to grieve during this process.  I want to find Christ to be even more satisfying than before, to know Him deeply in suffering.

Pray for me that I will be a man that sets aside his pride and asks Jesus Christ and others for help.

I'm seeing more clearly now then ever before that I cannot be fully engaged without the help of others and without the grace and presence of Christ.  Mandy and I consistently marvel at the generosity and love demonstrated by you who are following Jude's story.  We know that we, and Jude in particular, are being sustained by the Lord and through your prayers.  What a tremendous blessing you have been.  We give thanks to the Lord for you!!!

So, here are some things to pray for Jude when you read this...

* That Jude does well taking 2ml/hour of breast milk and that there are no digestion issues.  He began receiving the breast milk Mandy's been pumping while I've been at the hospital this evening.
* That Jude will be able to get his heart surgery at the end of the week (or early next week).  We talked to the cardiac surgeon tonight and, as of now, that's his plan.  He needed to consult one more time with the plastic surgeon who worked on Jude's head last week.
* That he will continue to pee lots of the fluid that is still around his belly.  He gained .1 kg yesterday and needs to drop around 1.2 kg of fluids overall.

Thank you so much :)