I'm beginning to understand that asking God, "Why?" when difficult things happen is an appropriate question to ask, it's just not the first question to ask.
The first question to ask God, at least when we are experiencing suffering, is, "Do you love us/Do you care?"
Life is confusing. It's messy and difficult much of the time. In our culture, love is primarily understood as a feeling. I think this is where we get into problems with God and many times in our romantic relationships as well. God's love for me cannot be dependent on something I feel today. My mood and feeling of being loved ebbs and flows with the ups and downs of life. I've learned not to trust in my feelings of being loved.
I know, with confidence, that I'm loved because God demonstrated to me His love. He did for me (and you) what we most desperately needed, He laid down His life to forgive us and allow us to become children of God. He revealed His love for all to see in history, at a specific time and in a specific place. "But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8)."
Knowing intellectually that I'm loved by God didn't change me that much initially. It's been a long road of internalizing this truth, of allowing it to sink deep into my soul over the years. Although we are going through intensely difficult things right now, wondering at times why this is happening, I am not wondering if the Lord cares about us. I'm not confused about His view of us. I know that His love is strong, real and exactly what we need. He showed me His love through Christ in the fullest extent a long time ago. Now that's good news!!
His body is still showing signs of infection
(occasional fever, increased white blood cell count, thicker mucus).
Over the last two days all of his tests have been negative! Praise God.
Please pray for any existing infections to clear up and for protection from new ones.
Infection is the greatest danger for him right now.
Jude got a bigger bed yesterday.
He's more accessible, and I have been able to lie down with him
a few times and nap beside him.
We're feeling a little more tired than normal.
Please pray that we will be refreshed in the coming days.
We're also still feeling so encouraged and supported by all of you.
Every day, the Lord encourages us in sweet ways through friends and family.
Thank you so much!