We just returned from being with our littlest guy. I got to hold him for the first time, and it was hard to let him go. Brandon is sick with the start of a cold (Caleb's cold), and so he is unable to touch him or hold him. But, we were glad that he could see him. It was wonderful holding the sweet little boy in my arms for over an hour. Soooo good for me.
Last night the doctors in the NICU successfully inserted the PICC line, which is a much more stable way to deliver medicine to Jude's heart. His platelet level also increased significantly after they did a platelet transfusion. Thanks for praying. Please continue to pray that they stabilize. His blood is also clotting better with some help from medication. So, that was good news.
This morning, we learned what has been hardest yet to hear. It appears that Jude has had a stroke...and is possibly experiencing seizure activity (something that might not be obvious in a newborn to an outside observer.) He was supposed to be getting an EEG now, but he is instead getting an MRI done as I write this. The doctor just called to inform us. There appears to be a hemorrhage outside the right ventricle of his brain and some swelling on the left side of his brain. This might explain the low platelet level...due to the bleeding. There is still much to learn, and our doctors (neonatologists, pediatric cardiologist and surgeon, nurses, and now a pediatric neurologist) are working hard to determine what is going on and what is the best course of action. The heart surgery (which we found out is not an open-heart surgery) is being postponed until they can learn more about what is going on in his brain.
The possible long-term repercussions of the issues with his brain are scary. Friends of ours have walked through similar circumstances, and so we're familiar with what the possible outcomes are. We don't know what tomorrow will bring...or even what the next hour will bring (as has been the case since yesterday morning). By the time we go to bed tonight, our world may very well be rocked once again.
While God has done so many good things lately, I have struggled today with thoughts such as "Lord, why aren't you answering prayers as we've asked you?" He just continues to remind us of His love, His sovereignty, and that His ways are not our ways. Our prayers may not be being answered as we would want, but He is answering us by giving us more of Himself. He is meeting us in ways we would never have experienced otherwise. We need Him desperately...and so does Jude and so does Caleb...more than anything else...even more than a clean bill of health.
He is the One who is writing this story...and while it isn't what we would have chosen, it will be better than anything we could have written. Please pray that we would trust Him as we begin the next chapter.
Please pray:
that his platelet level would continue to stabilize.
that the MRI would reveal good things.
that the repercussions of what is going on in his brain would be very minimal and mild.
for Caleb and his adjustment.
for Brandon and Caleb to heal...and that I would avoid sickness.
that we would trust God with our whole hearts and draw near to Him.
that He would continue to unify us in this process.
12 comments:
started following your blog a while ago and my heart aches for you but am so glad you're a believer. He will give you everything you need to breathe. praying specifically for your sweet little Jude. May He be glorified throughout all of this.
xoxo.
We continue to pray for your whole family, and especially for baby Jude. You are an amazing daughter of our Lord, Mandy, and I know that God is using you for some wonderful things!
Mandy, I cannot even imagine how you must be feeling right now! We are praying for you, Brandon, Caleb and Jude as you go through this rough patch. We know that God can work miracles more than we can even imagine, and we pray for those.
Our love is with you guys! We've been praying and will continue. God does hear us. Resting in the peace that God loves you all more than we do!
Praying for you and your family. We love you guys! So sad but also encouraged to see God's grace at work in your hearts. - John and Nicole Schmoll
Praying, praying, praying!! Thanks for the detailed updates. xo
Praying, Praying, Praying Mandy. Wish I could give you a huge hug. We love you guys so much.
Many prayers for you all, dear ones!
Mandy, I am keeping you and your family in my thoughts, as always. I've asked my friends who do to pray for your family and your beautiful little boy. Jude Matthew is such a perfect name for him. Thank you for sharing this with us all, and blessed be.
We've been praying for your family Mandy!
I am amazed at how God can create such precious beings...Jude Matthew is the perfect example...I just had a chance to see his picture and got watery eyes, he's perfect in every sense! Congrats guys, you really did a great job...We have and will continue to pray for the little prince and your entire FAMILY!
Mandy,
You and your family are an inspirational in a very difficult time. Jenn and I are praying for you and your family. Jude is beautiful. We will continue to send prayers your way.
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