Misunderstand not sickness...

A friend of ours died yesterday.  After a battle with liver cancer, Dave knew that the time that remained for him on earth was short and that Jesus was waiting.  Our friend had accepted the Lord's will for him.  He even embraced it.  He willingly became a vessel through whom God would teach us all about how to die well.

Even as he sat in a wheelchair in a hospice facility, Dave's words described how God had been pouring out grace upon grace in his last days.  With joy lighting up his face, he shared with wonder about all that the Lord had been showing him...and all that He was doing around him...in the lives of the people who visited him and in the lives of the others receiving hospice care.  It was truly amazing.

And, the Lord was faithfully preparing him to die.  He shared with us the following words from Richard Baxter's Directions for a Peaceful Departure...and they have stuck with me:

Misunderstand not sickness, as if it were a greater evil that it is; but observe how great a mercy it is, that death has so suitable a harbinger or forerunner: that God should do so much before he takes us hence, to wean us from the world, and make us willing to be gone; that the unwilling flesh has the help of pain; and that the senses and appetite languish and decay, which did draw the mind to earthly things...

Dave's cancer...though terrible...brought with it sweet blessings.  Because he allowed it to, his disease became a tool in the hands of God to wean him from this world and prepare him for the next.  And, because Dave trusted the Lord, He became our teacher as well.

Suffering loosens our grip on this temporal world and causes us to yearn for the next.  Jude has shown me that over this last year.  Now, Dave has shown me that as well. 

Thank You, Jesus, that because You live, death no longer has the victory.  Thank You that the separation from the ones we love is only temporary for those who trust in You.  Loosen our grip on the things of this world, and teach us to set our hopes on things eternal.  May our lives be lived in light of eternity.  Amen.

Source: tumblr.com via Geri on Pinterest

This man...

36 things on his 36th birthday

1. is my best friend.
2. points me to Jesus.
3. is the reason behind the vast majority of giggles in our home.
4. charms me with his beautiful smile.
5. is a wonderful, fantastic, amazing dad.
6. amazes me as he trains for a half marathon.
7. works hard...sometimes too much so.
8. gets me sucked into silly tv shows such as Storage Wars and American Pickers.
9. is a man of character and integrity.
10. is gracious when I leave wet laundry sitting in the washer until it starts smelling.
11. likes grande decaf mochas extra hot extra whip in a venti cup.
12. is really intentional about taking care of our cars.
13. has wisdom that blesses, surprises, and encourages me daily.
14. reads more than anyone I know.
15. is a really good driver...but scared me with his aggressive driving in Mexico.
16. understands me sometimes more than I understand myself.
17. is intentional in our marriage...often initiating marriage conferences and date nights.
18. has worked so hard on our house over the years...and learned all sorts of new skills.
19. is growing in flexibility when we travel.  :-)
20. is resourceful.
21. has helped me grow in more ways than I could ever relate.
22. is a thinker...though for our first months of marriage I thought he was staring into space.
23. is really fun to watch basketball with.
24. has taught me so much about financial responsibility.
25. pushes his son on his swing.
26. speaks truth to me when I need it.
27. is trustworthy.
28. accepts me as I am.
29. has a wonderful sense of humor that is currently developing in his son. 
30. likes life quiet.
31. still opens the car door for me when we go on dates.
32. trusts God with our family and our future...and helps me grow in trust as well.
33. loves to play with fire.
34. doesn't second guess his decisions...which is so good for me and my indecisiveness.
35. is such a wonderful gift from God to me, Caleb, and so many others.
36. turned 36 years old today, and I am thankful for every single one of them.

Happy Birthday, Babe!

We love you!

For Easter

I thought I would share two songs that I have been loving lately.  They come from *this wonderful album* which I love and listen to all the time (Thanks, Sarah)!  Check it out.  It looks like you can listen to the entire album online.  :-)

"Welcome to Poppy World!"

For eight years, I have waited for the poppies.

I once saw a photo of the Organ Mountains surrounded by fields of yellow,

and I wanted to experience it for myself.

The conditions, however, never seemed to be exactly what those pretty little things needed to grow.

And, each spring came and went...with no flowers in the desert.

 But, we have them now. :-)

Beautiful yellow fields blanketing the mountainside.

Caleb had a cute reaction when we stepped out of the car.

With arms opened wide, he spun around and cried:

"Welcome to Poppy World!!!"

Thanks, Lord, for such a timely gift.

So thankful for her...

Today marks two months that my mom has been staying with us,
and we celebrated with a little party.
It has been a really great experience for all of us, and I don't want it to end.

Caleb has been able to spend priceless time with his grandma,
and Brandon and I have loved the conversations we've had with her as well as her daily presence in our lives...
not to mention all the wonderful meals she makes us.  :-)

I will be forever grateful to God for this opportunity to have so much precious, quality time with my sweet mom.

And, I am so thankful to my dad for sacrificing so she can be out here.

We love you, Mom.

You're amazing,
and I am so proud to be your daughter.

Impressions and Confessions

Perception Management.  It is a phrase that has stuck with me for years. I first heard it used in a play in which the main character was looking back on his life and realized that his entire life had been focused on what he called "perception management."  His goal in life had inadvertently become to manage what people thought of him.

I struggle with this.  It is why I stopped blogging for over a year.  It is why I stopped posting photos to Facebook.  What people thought of me...whether it be a photo I posted or an update I shared...had become too important.  I judged the quality of my photo based on how many comments I received or didn't receive.  So, I stopped.  I posted much less on Facebook, and I took a break from blogging.  I started again only after Jude's diagnosis...and with much prayer.

The online world is full of perception management.  We present a public image that doesn't paint a true picture.  It's a false reality, and I am guilty of trying to dwell in it.  I post only the photos that I look best in.  I make sure to frame my photo so you can't see the messy laundry in the background.  And, if I am struggling with depression, I probably won't post on that day. 

Just as giving is really the only true antidote to materialism, it seems that sharing some of the uglier, broken parts could help free us of this incessant temptation to impress.  And, we might just find that His light shines brighter in our brokenness.

So, that's why I love my friend Holly's idea.  In order to combat this struggle, she wrote a wonderful post called Confessions.  And, in response to popular demand, she has created a link-up for us to do it as well. 

So, here are a few things I would like to confess:

My house is a disaster, and I am currently not cooking.  I have been seriously neglecting my home and my family to read Anne of Green Gables...and Anne of Avonlea...and Anne of the Island...and all the rest of those wonderful books.  I happened to pick the first one up a few weeks ago, and my free time has since been spent in the picturesque Prince Edward Island.  This treasured series was a staple of my girlhood, and I read them multiple times as a child.  Still, once I get into a fiction book, I dive in wholeheartedly until the book ends.  Once, I spent an entire month reading Harry Potter for the first time...while a baby Caleb played on a blanket beside me.  I don't do well with moderation.  And, everything around me...including my husband and child...gets neglected. 

I am terrible at following through with things.  Take my New Year's Resolutions for example.  At this point, I am way behind on my chronological Bible reading.  Getting up early has been overall wonderful but has taken a huge hit these past two weeks (I was up until 4:30am last night).  And, that Project 365 thing?  Yeah, I didn't make it much past February.  :-)

I am a hypocrite.  I often find myself telling Caleb not to do something and then I do it after he leaves the room.  I limit his video game time to 20 minutes, and then I spend hours wasting time on the internet.  Tonight, I told him he could have 2 more jelly beans because "they aren't good for him," and then I ate a fistful.  I do things like that all.the.time.  I think if I followed the instructions I give him, then I would probably live a much healthier life.

There are so many more.  Some I will leave for a future post.  If you'd like to share, head to Holly's blog and link up your post.  If you don't have a blog, feel free to share in her comments.  Now please excuse me while I go finish Rainbow Valley.  :-)

The Song of the Flowers

Even though people had forgotten, the birds and the flowers hadn't forgotten - 

they still knew their song.

It was the song all of God's creation had sung to him from the very beginning.

It was the song people's hearts were made to sing:
"God made us.  He loves us.  He is very pleased with us."

It was why Jesus had come into the world: 

to sing them that wonderful song; 

to sing it not only with his voice, but with his whole life -

so that God's children could remember it and join in and sing it, too.

From The Jesus Storybook Bible

p. 235

Sweet Acey

A few weeks ago, I got to spend some time

with an incredibly adorable baby

in front of my camera.

It was such a good step for me.

I hope to write a post about that in the future.

But, since I am having a hard time putting my thoughts into words lately,

I will just leave you with this beautiful little guy:

Thanks, Matt and Marissa!

We love you and your baby boy!

Gethsemane

The surroundings of Christ's final hour clearly displayed his sovereign control.  The intensity of his agony and his sovereign resolve to bear it, his control over his captors, his protection of his own, his grace to the wounded, all proved he is an omniscient, all-powerful God.  Christ was in control when life was falling in, when things looked the worst.


How does this relate to us? Though Christ's Gethsemane was infinitely beyond human experience, Gethsemanes are a part of believers' lives.  


Gethsemane was not a tragedy, and neither are our Gethsemanes.  This does not do away with the wounds of affliction in this life, but it is encouraging to see that behind human tragedy stands the benevolent and wise purpose of the Lord of human history.  Life may be dark at times, tragedy may come, and at times the whole world may seem to be falling apart.  The wheel may appear ready to crush us.  But this is not the end.  "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" (Rom. 8:28), even in Gethsemane.

R. Kent Hughes
Jesus, Keep Me Near the Cross:  Experiencing the Passion and Power of Easter
Edited by Nancy Guthrie

A Prayer Request

Hi friends.  I hope you all had a great weekend.

I know that most of you who have found my blog found it because you were praying for us.  Thank you.  There still is no way to fully express my gratitude.  Tonight, I wanted to ask you to pray for my uncle, Ron, who is going to begin radiation and chemo tomorrow for Stage 3 Esophageal Cancer.
Please pray that God would draw my family near to Him through all this. Pray that we would all know His love, peace and comfort as we look to Him for healing.  I am so thankful that prayer is not bound by geography, and that we have a God who asks us to "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you (1 Peter 5:7)." 

Thank you so very much!

My Childhood Crush

 Yesterday, I was so sad to learn that Davy Jones had died.

I have a somewhat hazy memory of a childhood conversation I had with my best friend, Heather. We were eight years old, and we were sitting at the top of the stairs at my house.  We were discussing my new crush.  I told her that I no longer liked Ricky Schroeder from the TV show, Silver Spoons.  Instead, I was now in love with Davy Jones of The Monkees.

And, although Heather was hesitant at first, she quickly joined me in my newfound passion.  In the beginning, we watched the tv show regularly.  Heather's parents had a vinyl record of The Monkees, and it became a treasure to us.  And, we had our magazines.  Apparently, we weren't the only ones in love with them because The Monkees graced the covers of all the teen celebrity magazines... 16, Bop, Tiger Beat etc.  In the magazines, we could even find pull out posters to hang on the wall.

I will never forget the day that my dad told me that he was taking me to a Monkees concert. My amazing mom had given me her ticket.  I can still feel the excitement as we headed towards the 1987 Indiana State Fair.  And, I can still remember the shock when I looked at the stage and realized that I had a crush on a forty-year-old.  

When I got home, I rushed to tell Heather, "He doesn't look like he does on TV.  He's old, but he's still cute!"

Our crushes continued through the purchase of many cassette tapes, lots of Tiger Beat magazines, and even an unforgettable Monkees Convention in Chicago.  We had a collection of "Davy stuff." We loved the Davy Brady Bunch episode, and I even had a VHS recording of a My Two Dads episode with a special appearance by Davy Jones.  

It was a crush that endured for years...until The New Kids on the Block began their memorable climb up the charts.  And, it was a crush that helped forge a wonderful friendship that endures to this day.  I will forever be grateful to The Monkees for that. 

Thank you, Davy Jones, for being such a memorable part of my childhood.

p.s.  I am so glad God says no to our prayers sometimes...as much as I asked him to let me marry a certain English pop star.

Linking up with Emily

My Little Bibliophile

My little man is learning to read!

For the past few weeks, we have begun working through Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons .
At first, we both thought it dry and boring, and I questioned seriously whether we would continue.
Soon, however, he started to apply what he was learning in the world all around him,
and learning to read quickly became exciting...for both of us.

Today, we tried out Bob Books for the first time.  Thanks, Elizabeth!  :-)
And, Caleb read through the first and second books on his own this afternoon.  
I caught the last part with my camera, and I thought I would share this super short video: 

A Felt Journal

A few weeks ago, I made this felt journal cover and bookmark for a blog challenge.

Last week, I found out that I won.

Never mind that I was the only one who entered.  :-)

It was a lot of fun to take the challenge

to make something out of the heart and key diecuts.

And, today I received my prize of lovely wool felt from the wonderful Janet...

complete with the sweetest little sea-themed diecuts for Caleb.

Thank you so much, Janet.  We both loved them. 

You can read more about the challenge here

at Larissa's wonderful craft blog.

You can also read about it here at Janet's blog.

Her wool felt can be found here.

Snowy Adventures in the Mountains

Last weekend, we were up in the mountains for a staff retreat.  Because Brandon and I were in Albuquerque with Jude for most of the fall semester, it has been a very unique year for our team.  So, we all (except the kids) left the desert to enjoy the alpine beauty of the mountains of Southern New Mexico.

With that lovely mountain beauty came snow.  Lots of it.  And, our Honda Odyssey minivan did not like that snow.  At all. We got stuck multiple times as we tried to drive on that mountain road, and our tires were unable to get any kind of traction.  Thankfully, our friends Jesse and Nick were with us...and they pushed us up a good portion of the highway.  Eventually, we were unable to go any farther.  So, Brandon joined the guys in helping out other vehicles while I watched from the comfort of our warm car.

Eventually, a snowplow rescued us...which was a true answer to prayer.  So, we were able to join the rest of our team for a fun-filled weekend of good rest, great food, and sweet friendships.  It was much needed for all of us.   We are so thankful to have such wonderful people in our lives.

For Lent...

Andrea

Today my beautiful cousin Andrea underwent surgery for a second time to replace the large portion of her skull crushed by the Sugarland stage collapse.

Would you please pray for her?

Please pray against infection and that the Lord would continue to change lives through hers.  

I am so proud of you, Andrea...

and so grateful to call you family.

You are so loved.

Edited to Add:
You can learn more about the stage collapse in this article on CNN today.
You can learn more about Andrea's story in this video that was on CNN today as well.

Do you not know?  Have you not heard?

The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary,

and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;

they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint. 

Isaiah 40:28-31

In the mountains...

Six Months

Six months.
How much our lives have changed in just six short months...

As we were watching a video of Jude today while we were supposed to be doing school, Caleb and I both began to cry.  As I held him, he told me, "Mommy, I don't want my brother to grow up in heaven.  I don't want to wait my whole life to see him again."

I read this today:

"If God had told me some time ago that He was about to make me as happy as I could be in this world, and then had told me that He should begin by crippling me in arm or limb, and removing me from all my usual sources of enjoyment, I should have thought it a very strange mode of accomplishing His purpose.  And yet, how is His wisdom manifest even in this!  For if you should see a man shut up in a closed room, idolizing a set of lamps and rejoicing in their light, and you wished to make him truly happy, you would begin by blowing out all his lamps; and then throw open the shutters to let in the light of Heaven."

-Samuel Rutherford, as quoted by Joni Eareckson Tada

in O Love That Will Not Let me Go by Nancy Guthrie

Joni goes on to write: 

Suffering makes us want to go to heaven.  Broken homes and broken hearts crush our illusion that earth can keep its promises;  that it can really satisfy.  Only the hope of Heaven can truly move our passions off the world - which God knows could never fulfill us anyway - and place them where they will find their glorious fulfillment.

Someday we will see more clearly why God chose to fulfill His purpose for Jude's life in just 67 days instead of 67 years.  In the meantime, it is my hope and prayer that we will allow the Lord to fulfill His purpose in ours...however many years remain.  And, I thank God for how He has used our littlest to point our hearts towards our true Home.

Thank you for praying for us.  Would you please pray specifically for Caleb?  He seems to be struggling more lately.

Jude and Caleb on Speedboats (by Caleb)

The Empathy Experience

According to Unicef,

2 children are trafficked into the sex trade every minute.

Two. children. every. minute.

On Friday night in Las Cruces, 

there will be an opportunity to explore and engage this tragic issue:

The Empathy Experience

In the Downtown Mall at Green Works from 7 - 8:45pm,

there will be a multimedia exhibit that includes film, photography,

and unforgettable, heartbreaking artifacts. 

A live band, the Pioneers of Primetime TV, will be playing,

and there will be an opportunity to hear from the founders of iEmpathize...

an incredible organization that advocates for the voiceless

by using media to raise awareness

of this tragedy that is occurring not only around the world but also in our own backyards.

They also use the media they create to help prevent it.

 

We are big fans of this organization.

A little over a year ago, our students decided to do something about this issue,

and in November of 2010, NMSU Cru hosted iEmpathize and put on Empathy Week.

Students from all over campus used chalkings, social media, and old-fashioned peer pressure to

speak up for those who can't speak for themselves.

It was a powerful week, as you can see from the photos below.

And you can see the same exhibit that was on display during Empathy Week

here in Las Cruces on Friday night.

It will be a poweful, compelling evening, 

and I really don't think you should miss it.

Unfortunately, we will because we have another event that cannot be rescheduled.  :-(

If you'd like to help promote the Empathy Experience,

you can download the flyer here. 

He has shown you, O man, what is good.
   And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
   and to walk humbly with your God. 

Micah 6:8

He knows.

This was good for me tonight.

Check out Amanda's adorable blog here.

She is incredibly talented,

and her illustrations are perfect for visual people like myself.